Let’s be honest here, Ice creams, and by extension, ice lollies, are always going to be the primary consumable of the summertime, but, no matter how you look at it, they’re food. Sometimes, when you’re on the verge of suffering minor heatstroke, and your skin is a distinct shade of salmon, a sticky treat isn’t the most ideal purchase.
The ice-cream, be it a 99 Flake, a Screwball, a Twister, Fab or even two scoops of Pistachio in a waffle cone, has been an iconic treat of the Great British summertime for centuries. However, we believe that the humble Slushie could be the ice-cream’s biggest contender for the ultimate cool-down treat.
“But Lewis, you handsome devil, you work for a company that deals with Slush drinks! Aren’t you slightly biased?”
That’s a very valid point, dear reader. It’s not as if I’d write a blog post that totally knocks the very industry that puts the food on my table, however, I’m also not here to slate ice-cream. In fact, I believe, firmly, that Slushies and Ice-creams are the ultimate partnership, the Turner and Hooch, if you will, of the summer treat scene.
We’ve all been there, walking up and down the lines of a car-boot sale, holding a bag of oranges and a He-Man action figure in one hand, and a 99-Flake wrapped in a napkin dripping steadily down the other; desperately trying to lick the melting drips before they reach your watch like some frenzied lizard. Whilst undeniably delicious, ice creams aren’t the cleanest of eats.
Now, picture this, you’re walking down a stone staircase, the sun is beating down as you head to your private pool. Your wife, a beautiful Norwegian skier, hands you a yard-long, 99% fruit slushie. The flavour hits you first, an explosion of berries, followed by the icy refreshment that perfectly complements the warmth of the sun, even the condensation on the outside of the cup equalises your temperate to an ideal average. Seagulls circle above. You laugh. Had you been eating an ice-cream, you would have been a prime target for their brutal attacks.
Okay, so maybe that was a bit one-sided, however, slushies outsell ice-creams 15:1 when a machine is placed in a convenience store. And with the sugar-free and 99% fruit ranges, Slushies are arguably quite healthy.
That being said, this wouldn’t be an objective, non-biased, blog without looking at some of the negatives. For example: Unlike the waffle cone of an ice-cream, you can’t eat the cup, nor do they contain the trace calcium of a dairy ice-cream…
Also, if you have an important meeting with an influential person, a blue raspberry stained tongue could negatively impact any first impressions you wish to make.
In summary, ice-creams are pretty good, they’re tasty, and an icon of the Great British Summertime. On the other hand, Slushies are also outrageously delicious, come in a whole range of flavours and different types (sugar free and 99% fruit for example), and there hasn’t been a single recorded incident of a seagull stealing one. I think we all know who the clear winner here is.